Sandra Bullock Wisdom

Do you remember on Oscar Night, when Sandra Bullock gave a shout out to the "moms that take care of the babies and children no matter where they come from?" I'm guessing the audience thought she was paying homage to her movie, "The Blind Side," (which I still haven't seen) but she was offering a clue to her little Louie that she had adopted a few months back. I would also extend her MOMS to the males and females that choose to love on surrogate children. So why am I in this reflective mood? Well, it's partly because I have been doing my bi-decade spring cleaning and finding all sorts of pix and dust bunnies! This picture was taken in July, 1995, at my cousin's wedding and it's an incredible event! I'm sandwiched in the middle of my parents, Gus and Anna. I had just FOUND GUS a year before and our relationship was always a little rocky, probably because he was on a mission to kill his liver from his days as a Navy boy in Jacksonville! Still, there was a hole in me that would never have been filled had I never met him...To Anna's left is Charles, the man who raised me since I was four. If I was honest I would say that our relationship was a little rocky as well, especially after "their" child came along two years later. Still, because of Charles, I had stability and grew up in the same house until I left home, I had my first car (a '66 Rambler!) and I had a Catholic high school education, and my first job at Southern Bell (he retired with 40+ years) and a few loans-on-demand, and if I was honest, he might have even played a minute part in my daughter's name. Still, it's really tough when you are 8 years old and you have to stop signing your name CINDY LEE HARDWICK and relearn CINDY LEE INGRAM! I suppose Charles really didn't have to step up to the plate, I mean he was 37 when he married my mom, and that was his one and only marriage! During my first year of teaching, I was called to my Principal's office, with the news that Charles was gone. My priest came and picked me up and we went to the hospital. Of course, everyone else had already left but because I was with an "official collar person," they let me view the body. So I told him that I really did appreciate his support throughout the years, even if he was a hard man to love. I think he must have had a wonderful experience at his death because his mouth was slightly opened and slightly smiling like he was really beholding something amazing! I was asked to give the eulogy, which I did, and I used the LOVE VERSES in 1 Corinthians 13, you know.."Love is patient, Love is kind...." Charles showed his love by doing things, usually involving repairs of everything electronic! In fact, after the funeral, all his (and my) Southern Bell buddies reminded me, "Abe put in my surround sound," or "Abe fixed my washing machine," you get the idea. (He got the moniker ABE after Honest Abe!) It was less than five years later when I had to stand at another grave, and this time I heard a 21-gun salute and received his flag. The best thing about Gus (He got his moniker from Gustavos, a man he really admired, and his first employer in Jacksonville) was that he had several relationships after mom which produced two brothers, John and Justin. John and I are facebook friends which is awesome and Justin met our father at the funeral. (Long story for another day..We got to reconnect a year later when his family vacationed in Orlando!) One cool thing is I went to Korea with the University of Florida four summers ago. My father had been a POW, and over twenty years later, John was stationed there, then another twenty years later, I showed up. So it was cool to walk in the footsteps of the Hardwick men! I blogged about my trip every day, and John was my biggest fan! So, I guess you can say I'm the perfect example of NATURE and NURTURE. So, this is a strange blog, but this is where my heart is today!!!